Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself by Melody Beattie

Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry & Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft

Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving: A Guide and Map for Recovering from Childhood Trauma by Pete Walker

The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk M.D.

I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn't): Making the Journey from "What Will People Think?" to "I Am Enough" by Brené Brown

Why Won't You Apologize?: Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts by Harriet Lerner, Ph.D.

Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger by Soraya Chemaly

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert By John M. Gottman, Ph.D. and Nan Silver

I made this playlist, and it has helped me get through some tough times. Enjoy!

Assists in finding affordable counseling for US residents. Individual sessions range $30-$60

-According to Thought Co., emotional vocabulary is “the collection of words you use to express their feelings and reactions to events.”
-Use this PDF to build a better vocabulary to identify your feelings/emotions.

-Keep handy to improve your emotional vocabulary + practice digging deeper than the “primary” emotions.

-I like how she took one step further. She writes, “It’s an adaptation of the “feelings wheel” that many therapists and educators use to help people learn to better recognize and name their emotions- But my take is a little different: the outer circle of this feeling wheel swaps emotion-names for descriptions of the physical sensations that often accompany feeling that feeling.”

-This provides a great background on what a gratitude journal is, prompts, templates you can use, and apps.

-8 total exercises you can do on your own.

-Utilize to help change your thoughts.

Use this to work on “assuming the worst/predicting the future” cognitive distortions. NOTE: this website makes you read the instructions for at least 60 seconds before it allows you to click to download the PDF.

Decatastrophizing is about exploring the reality and facts of a situation rather than letting yourself be carried away by thoughts of “What If...?”

Positive Self-Talk + Coping Thoughts Worksheet

This worksheet helps you unpack where you learned various concepts around sex + gender as a child.

This could be used to help you navigate conversations with your partner or figure out what you like.

It covers things like...
-what you want to do.
-what you like sexually.
-if you like toys and lubes.
-what turns you on.
-boundaries (on what should/shouldn’t be said or done)

You can either use this as a mental self-evaluation tool or talking with a partner as you go through it together.  Lists like this are not finish lines but starting points: for evaluating your own sexuality and/or for deeper conversations with someone else.

RESOURCES FOR SURVIVORS!! Be sure to swipe through all 5 pictures.

Available 24/7 for chat & calls [1-800-787-3224] for women, men, and LGBTQ survivors of domestic violence. They also offer safety planning.

Available 24/7 for chats & calls [1-800-656-4673] for sexual assault survivors.

Available 24/7 chat for men who are survivors of sexual assault.  Also offer support group meetings.

Supports youth and young adults in ending dating violence. The website includes planning resources, legal help, educator toolkits, and more. [Can also call 1-800-331-9474 or text “loveis” to 22522].

StrongHearts Native Helpline is a safe domestic, dating and sexual violence helpline for American Indians and Alaska Natives, offering culturally-appropriate support and advocacy daily from 7 a.m. to 10 p.m. CT. Anonymous and confidential. [1-844-762-8483]

The Northwest Network works to end abuse in lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender communities. It strives to support and empower all survivors through education and advocacy. [1-206-568-7777]

Crisis hotline surviving transgender people (1-877-565-8860)

The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals. [1-800-273-8255]

Assist in finding affordable counselors, individual sessions range from $30-$60.

runs support groups for people struggling with Codependency.