Love Life Stories


Not your regular

My name is Modelina Hart. Hail from Rivers State, Nigeria. Since I was a child in primary school, I have had the passion of writing, being an inspiration, and serving help or advice. I have tutored many and tour different countries and cities reaching out to great intellectual minds in Africa. In 2015, I boldly owned it as a career, ushering it a subsection of Shamls Group, a family entrepreneurship business - Hart Family. I had few written books from childhood, so I dived into online publishing, and so far have other books written as well. Wrote more about my passions, my thoughts, and relationship matters. I founded Melisa with a mission to give others a taste of what goes on in my mind and life, put minds in real life situations through my stories, be an inspiration to many, and guide couples on their love path. This personal blog focuses on the life of Modelina, story books, relationship matters and lifestyle. Take some time to explore my blog, read something interesting, see something beyond, and feel free to reach out if you would like to collaborate on a project together or have a therapy session about your relationship. 

©Melisa - Shamls Group

Blog site

My YouTube Channel

TALES characters animation videos on Keeping it Real with Melisa.

"When we embrace all that life has to offer, we  can achieve success both personally and professionally by surrounding ourselves with love" 

Join Modelina Hart, a love doctor/relationship counselor every Sunday as she interviews guests from different views of life as they share their values, beliefs, and experiences about love, and relationships with people.

Do you want to explore and identify aspects of your life to better understand yourself and others? THIS IS FOR YOU


Sexual Assault

Whom to marry and why?

Whom to marry and why? 2

Whom to marry and why? 3 _ Pinky advises Rose

Mrs. Ebuka's sexual frustration

What is Love? Episode 1 with Daniel Addo

Party Rider - a glimpse

Boyfriend snatcher




July Session with the QUEENS.

Melisa SG is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.

Topic: LOVE, SEX and MARRIAGE (Zoom Meeting)
Time: Jul 19, 2020 05:00 PM Africa/Accra

Anyone can join

Join Zoom Meeting

Meeting ID: 726 4251 5683
Password: LSMWM

An interesting topic millions have talked and preached about. There are vital information that contrast the cultural and religious mind, and so left out. In our world today, truth is dead and selfishness rules the order of tge day.

From the view of the Bible, there are lots of passages talking about love, sex and marriage.These passages make us understand that;

Love is a choice.

Love has no perfect balance.

Love has rules and expectations.

Love is not between equal parties.

Love is the key to a lasting relationship.

Love grows.

Sex is good and not shameful in itself.

Sex is a blood relation.

Sex should be a regular activity amongst married couples

The primary aim of sex isn't reproduction of man.

Husbands have no right to deprive their wives of sex and vice versa, except in agreement not to.

The husband owns the body of his wife and vice versa.

Being married and having a lover are two different things.

It's not good for a man to be alone.

There's no marital personality, as there is marital ties.

Courtship is a sacred path into marriage.

Being married before age 25 is not a bad thing and healthy.

Duty of the man to groom the woman into his ideal wife during courtship, and in the hidden things of God in marriage.

Quotes for the month

The simple guides and revelations on our paths through this world

"If you want something you've never had, you must be willing to do something you've never done" 
Thomas Jefferson 

"Love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it does. Love is a battle, love is a war; love is a growing up."
James A Baldwin 

"Love is a gross exaggeration of the difference between one person and everybody else."
George Bernard Shaw

"All this worldly wisdom was once the unamiable heresy of some wise man."
Henry David Thoreau 

"Don’t burden others with your expectations. Understanding their limitations can inspire compassion instead of disappointment, ensuring beneficial and workable relationships. Remember that you have only a short time together. Be grateful for each day you share."
Chagdud Tulku Rinpoche

"Hustling is not compulsory.  Grace is a beautifier. When you acknowledge the grace upon a man's life, that grace begins working in your life."
Modelina Hart 



The support of women power isn't only in politics or business, but also in respect of our love affairs _ ONE HER

First, I must acknowledge that we all have insecurities at one point in our lives, irrespective of gender, race, background or belief. This writeup throws light on the insecurity of a woman leading her to compete with other women. To be clear that this piece doesn't shame any woman who has made changes to her appearance and lifestyle.

Based on the focus of this piece, many of us might have come across that lady who is trying so hard in physique and personality to be us or someone else. Is that a bad thing? Absolutely not. Many of us have role models, and some go a mile to look like that person physically for different reason such as self improvement, body goals, popularity, etc. What I'm about to say is a fact that many of you have come across, acknowledged or might be yourself. There are ladies whose reasons to this is due to insecurities which sometimes creates unhealthy competition.

Ask yourself, what's your reason for having that butt and hips enlargement, bleaching, personality change, breast implant, piercing, etc? Is it for self love, work inclined, family acceptance, or is it just because of a man? Man! The major reason for competition amongst women for years after years now. Let's unravel this unhealthy competition resulting from insecurity of a woman because of a man.

Some women feel a man dumped them because of their BODY SIZE AND SHAPE, COMPLEXION, HAIR, ETC. Women in this category try to change their body physique. It's quite a painful struggle when a woman tries in her power to fit into the picture they feel that man loves and wants. They aren't doing it for self love and appreciation, but his love and appreciation. It becomes dicy when this lady goes as far as surgical changes, bleaching, piercing just to make that man see them and crazily he got a lady, one he loves and appreciates.

Have you ever come across or are you that woman who starts obsessing about the other woman? These women won't acknowledge that they're obsessed, jealous and tryna fight so damn hard to have and keep that man, that they try to copy and be like the woman he loves, and compete to overthrow her acknowledging themselves to be way better and more deserving to be his lover than her. So, what do they do? They first wonder what exactly does she have that they don't. What is her weakness they can gain strength in to make him look in their direction is the complete tool. They get him thinking about, "Oh! My Lady isn't perfect, I'd be complete with the obsessed in the picture." What can they do better to then seem more presentable than she is, and boom she's out.

They start by changing their body appearance to conform to the other lady. They want to have same body shape as her. Study in same field as she did. Run in same line of work has she does. Everything she does, they immediately copy. They want to work where she works. Join organizations she is part of. And they would do their best to be in lead. Some go as far as bearing a new identity - name, D.O.B, family, education.

If she's a curvy lady, they undergo surgery or use butt and hips pills and creams to look curvy. If she has big breasts, they do breast implant or use breasts creams. If she's fair, they bleach themselves. If she has a pierced body part, they do same. If she doesn't wear certain outfits and jewelries, they stop too. If she's slim, they do surgery or drown in slimming tea. If she wants to have a low hair cut, next they want to do that to. If she isn't the makeup person, they go natural or vice versa. All they spend so much of their time, money and energy doing is just to conform to that other lady's image to get that man in question. From their way of life, speech, life questions and charisma you can easily tell most often they don't know their purpose in life. They don't know why they are on earth. They have no clue about eternity. Their actions hardly match their words. They hardly want to be confronted with facts such as this. They always get fenced up on matters about that guy in question, even though their life is painted with him and they act like his lover, because they may get caught and their obsession seen right through.


What they need is love, health care and self revelation. A man is fixated to a woma by how much he admires her.

My advice to young ladies is to do better. You're more than a copy image. Appreciate yourself the way you are. If he left you, it's not because of your look. He might tell you so as polite manner of breaking up with you to actually prove him right breaking up with you because of your self esteem and insecurities when you act like this. Ladies often misunderstand the reasons behind a man's choice of woman. Ask yourself this, if it was because of your physique, why the hell in the first place did he look at you? A man can leave a woman for several reasons, which most times doesn't have anything to do with your appearance. They only use that, making I seem that way as a way to make you feel insecure, compete over them, question yourself why, beat yourself up and feel like you're the problem. Now, you actually become the problem when you don't be a better version of yourself, become better and work on your flaws, but rather try to become a better version of someone else for your self will and satisfaction of love, mostly for that man in question.
Women have to understand that a man can appreciate, adorn and be attracted to big butts and hips, big boobs, light skinned, classic, slim, short, tall, fat, etc. But it doesn't equal his needing one. Example; a man is often at the strip club watching big butts winning and grinding all night, but he gets to love and settle with the shy, flat butt, tangerine breasts, poor dancer, teddy girl. A mab could also very well never neared a strip club or bar, always secluded in the work, faith and family environment, but will end up loving and settling down with a street club girl.

A man wants a woman who let's herself go the moment he says he's in it for him alone. Self appreciation vibe the way you are. Respect him as well as respect yourself. Choose him out of both need and want, and not out of desperation or to fix your self insecurities. They want you to have your own unique identity, be original and not some copied image off a book or your idea of the kind of girl they love and want, or women in their life, and most definitely not a woman they love. Don't go shopping if you're not dropping. Understand their choice is foremost based on inner self and originality, and so far off from sexual lasting in bed, body physique, and charm, it's very insulting to a man. A woman who is happy and self fulfilled.



The rate at which men are unfaithful and the reason behind it is a whole different dimension that women can't seem to understand or digest. Men I've come across who happened to cheat don't even understand why they in all entirety cheated on their spouse whom they love. They continue the act often out of guilt.

A woman I salute asked a triggering question, which is indeed a problematic shock  in our world today. "WHY DO MEN WHO CHEAT MALTREAT AND ABUSE THEIR WIVES BECAUSE OF THEIR  MISTRESSES" Several debates from both men and women as to why. A man said this wasn't true as most men of these days are aware of the importance of peace in their homes. The minds of many only saw the physical side to this question. Let's get a touch on the psychological and it's effects, using a story someone threw light on in the argument. But, the writer termed the wife a witch and uncaring soul, worst the wife was a nobody, came into the family as a nobody and will remain so for life. The writer stated the husband gave the wife everything she needed. She could travel to anywhere in the world. The effects of the maltreatment and abuse from the head was not analyzed. I'll tell the story and add my analysis from my angle as to the effects on the wife was. 
Men these days have become smart and alert. They know women are very emotional. So why not abuse her mentally rather than physically. Hide their beast self, break the woman emotionally and unleash the lioness in her. 

Maltreatment is not only physical. It is also psychological. 
He doesn't pay attention as before. Rough on bed. Not satisfying her sexually. Sex is done only when he wants it. Pays more attention to his female friends than her. Supports his female friends and not her. Doesn't do lot of stuffs in the usual way as before. 
Men are often fond of this, because they battle with over familiarity with their wife. That's why most relationships, the beginning is often more rosy from the man's part. At a certain point he begins to see her as his sister, his mother. He still loves her, but his emotions are not sparkling as before. He wakes up every morning next to her. He needs something different. He needs a fresh lane. At another point it's now all about fatherhood, that he forgets he's a husband. In as much as most women love beautiful things and a man who spoils them, it doesn't mean love nor can it fill the space of husband. Sex and money can't do this. But to the man, as long as he provides money constantly for the upkeep of the home, children and her other needs, he's doing the right thing, nice and a good husband and father. If she says anything in contrary, the next question would be "how else do you want me to make the money you enjoy and for the children?" "Of  course I have to work and I'm stressed out everyday. I don't have time as before. Of course things have changed"

She doesn't want to travel to anywhere on her own all the time. What's the point? If it's not with friends, family or her husband more often than just herself? What's with all the money when the sweet melodies have gown down? What's with it all when she feels more alone as a wife, despite all the luxuries and good treats? Now, there's enough room for people who don't really care to step in and they'll corrupt her judgement. There's enough room for she to travel alone and see young and old couple doing what she wants, what used to be her story, "young new love", she misses that. At a point she's seeing a caretaker and giver, not a husband. Any man out there who has a mistress do that. Young men are doing same for their lovers. Men are doing so for baby mamas. So what stands him out as her husband, not father of her children, not financier, etc? There are homes where the man doesn't have much as the woman. The woman does most of the financial expenditures and they are living blissful and happy, because the husband has not forgotten he is first a husband and his wife has emotional expectations and a lot of beautiful combinations. 
Our world today, boarding school is more endorsed than ever. In other to give parents the chance to still be husbands and wives and do things as from the start. This way the family stands the weather. 
Sometimes a mistake can have a long term mental effect on the victim.





Quotes _ Poems _ Proverbs _ Lessons _ Letters






Pride comes before a fall

This table I'm about to shake, I just hope it doesn't break while you're standing on it.

It's not enough to know the meaning of colleague, friend, acquittance, family, mentor, and leader.

If you've not understood the yardstick for classifying the people in your life into these broad categories, then you'll probably miss out of big opportunities in life when they come.

Some people have met those who can transform their lives but they messed up big time.

Lots of guys have finally come in contact with the ladies that should be the suppose "destiny helpers" they've been praying for. But due to their burning Solomon spirits, they wooed the ladies to bed instead.

This article is long overdue. I was going to write it 6 days ago but didn't.

It's a long read. If you can, journey with me to the end.




If you are abreast with global trends, you should know that the world biggest economies, China and the USA (America) have been fighting a trade war for months.

America slapped heavy tariffs on $200B worth of Chinese goods being imported into America; while China reciprocated the gesture by hitting America with retaliatory tariffs.

One of the causes of the war is hinged to the fact that America has been having huge trade deficit against China for years. President Trump, being a core nationalist is hard bent at changing the narrative. And the war began.

Away from the US-China trade war, something dramatic happened a week ago. It was something that made me receive sense.

America is also having immigration problems. There has been an influx of immigrants into the US through the Southern border they share with Mexico.

Most of the immigrants are not even from Mexico. However, they need to pass through Mexico to get to the US.

Trump has been very vocal about this and swore to put an end to it. Severally, he called on Mexico to do something about it to no avail.

So late last month, he tweeted that unless Mexico steps up to manage the migration imbroglio, he would slap tariffs on 5% of all Mexican goods sold to the US.

That will adversely affect the Mexican economy in tune of billions of dollars.

The tariff was scheduled to take effect on June 10th and would increase weekly by 5% until Mexico does something astonishing about the immigration from their end.




Keenly, I followed this threat waiting to see how Mexico would react. I expected things to get nasty. Perhaps they would threaten the US too with a retaliatory tariff just as China did.

Lo and behold, I was wrong. Almost immediately, Mexico's president told the press  he will enter a dialogue with the US in a bid to avert the threat.

That diplomatic push seemed too "cowardly" of the Mexican president, most especially because Trump was still spitting fire and brimstone against them.

Not too long after, Mexico sent a delegation to Washington. Within a few days, they signed a deal with the US, stooping low to the demands of America.

This taught me a big lesson.




Some of the problems we are facing in life are because we've not understood the "cultural" meaning of the word "mate" and we've not identified who they are. 

Over-familiarity has made us categorize several persons as our equals.

I often hear people say things like, "See your mate dey play ball for Barcelona" or "See person wey you senior dey do things, and you dey here."

So I ask, does sharing the same birth year with someone automatically make them your mate in all ramification?

Or does sitting in the same office with them make you equal?

We mistake our colleagues to be friends and those we should call mentors, we have foolishly decided to call them mere colleagues.

What you call someone determines the honor you will accord them.

Social media went agog last year when pictures of Davido in his NYSC Khaki flooded the internet.

Nigerians called it absurd for NYSC officials to take snapshots with him. They argued it was out of place for him to be given the stage to perform in the orientation camp among other numerous rants.

Some were even asking why he should be treated any different from other corps members? I was just shaking my head in silence.

Mhen... Ain't a fan of the artiste, but let's be honest. If you were in the capacity of the officials, would you have acted any different?

For crying out loud, this is Nigeria. Davido and other corps members are not mates. Fact.

He is a public figure who may even get a higher ovation than the President of the Federal Republic of Nigeria. But the pride in you is asking those officials not to "honor" him because he is a boy abi? 

Please, would you have acted any different?

It is easy for China to flex muscles with the US. But it would have been foolishness for Mexico to do same.

I mean, America's GDP is 17 times higher than Mexico's. And their GDP grows yearly, many thanks to their annual trade with the US.

Although the deal the Mexican president sealed is currently under debate in the Mexican legislative body, it doesn't change the fact that they know America is not their mate.

You may call it an economic bullying, but in the words of Napoleon of Animal Farm,

"All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others."

As Daddy John Obidi will say, one of the first steps to success is to define your fight. Yes. Define who you are and where you are headed.

If you are in any way disadvantaged due to societal imbalance or family background, please note that your fight is different and you should be humble enough to stoop to conquer.

This is a principle that men like Nyesom Wike understand and applied to rise in his political career.

No one becomes a boss automatically. At some point, you will have to bow to someone. Often times, that someone may be far younger than you.

As crude, abusive, and demeaning as it sounds, you may have to say thank you to that someone while you are being insulted.

Learn it! It's part of the process. 

There is a default level of pomposity in man, a desire to measure up and belong to the ruling class.

We think too highly of ourselves and consider it pride to bend to people we know are higher than us in certain areas of life.

The other day I heard Mr. A advising Mr. B to quit his job. I know the advisor to be earning less than 50K in his place of work.

On the other hand, the advisee works in a firm where he should be earning over 120K or thereabout. He has a family and two kids.

He was advised to quit because his boss, a lady, is temperamental and was always quick to hurl insults at his employees at the slightest provocation.

Due to his egoistic complex, Mr. A felt the best thing Mr. B could do was to quit his job even though he wasn't sure of another.

I can't count how many times I have offered free services to people I call mentors.

I do crazy things for them to the extent that people call me foolish.

They couldn't understand why I will "belittle" myself before such persons. People see these ones as my colleagues and friends, but I know I'm not their mate.

So I call them mentors, accord them their due honor in order to rise with them.

Learn it! It's essential for getting to the top.

Some of your classmates you call colleagues are loaded with the requisite wisdom to change your life for the best.

Don't be too proud to identify the grace upon their lives. Sir, meet them and be blessed by their wisdom.

A few of the people you call industry mates are far more advanced than you with great connections that can take your business to the next level.

Ma, don't be too proud to ask them to show you the way.

This is the reason some persons will be in a church for years without being blessed. However, someone else will come to the church once and leave fulfilled.

The difference is that the members have so familiarized themselves with the pastor that they no longer believe he has anything to offer. 

Honor is the word.

A lot of successful people today are thriving on relationships they built in their youth.

This is the time to identify those who are higher than you in class, profession and social status.

It's time to bond with those you need. Grow your relationship with them. Learn from their experience and grow. In years to come, what you call "insults" and "belittling" today will be stories to laugh about when you at the top.




When your self interest becomes an ultimatum over humanity

You said you love me

And I ask myself what is love

What is love to you…Ans me

Cause if what you show me is love

Then I never want a taste of your love…

Maybe you can keep it to yourself…

You kept me in a friend zone…

I never got to enter your zone…

Made me your best friend…

Besti, Padi you called me…

Yet no attention from you

I was INVISIBLE to you

You showed you attention on some other guy…

You had a boyfriend, your lover boy!!!

“But I love you”, you said…

You never meant brotherly love something more

So you don’t love your boyfriend…

“I love him but… I also love you”

How can you serve two master at the same time…?

Why play with my heart

Then toss me aside…

I loved you, I fell for your deceit

You used me…

I feel used…

I have been used… What!!!

You only fall on my shoulders, when he treats you badly…

Ok that’s the only time I’m remembered,

That is when I became significant…

So am now a back battery,

A power bank when your main power supply goes off…

Should I say a Backup Boyfriend?

Please  can you tell me what I am to you?

I need the truth… Please 

Are you okay…?

Madu, madu, madu…

I wanted to use my money to scatter your brain

Spend a couple of milli on you…

I wanted to show you the world

I wanted to show you Love…

But I was not enough for you

You lied to me, I’m so used by you

 I am nothing but   a backup for you when you’re down town…

Don’t you tell me you love me

Don’t come running to me

Because I have moved on…

You left me that I drained slowly away

Now my heart is turned…

The old I is dead...

I’m so far away that you can’t reach to me now…





Lost in your own world. And no one seems to care. No one pays attention. No knock of visitations. Graven silence. Alone and lonely.

Hello there, Hey there,

Excuse me,

Can you see me…?

Can you feel me…?

Can you touch me…?

Am I also voiceless?

That you can’t hear me


I move out every day to meet people…

Yet am not noticed, I’m not seen

Even those I’m close to…

Find it difficult to notice me

I try to shout out but not heard

I’m wright there with you yet I’m insignificant...

I stand in front of you but you see me not…

You hold my hands but feel nothing…

I sit right next to you but you talk to the guy afar of…

I hold in my hands what you need and you ask the guy who seats next to me

You know me, yet I’m a stranger…

You came into the room and you greet everyone but me…

You pass me by like I don’t exist

To you am not there at all…

When everyone leaves the room then am noticed

Then final the words came out of your mouth

Hello, how are you…

I’m not fine don’t ask I say slowly in my mind

Wright there in my heart

Am not invisible to the eye

But invisible to the mind

Your mind, your world, your whole existence

I feel lonely because you decided to make me Invisible…

I might be invisible to you and everyone else

Now I have people, who see me for what I am

Found my place…

A place where I’m visible…

A place where I’m Indomitable…

A place where I’m felt…

A place where I’m needed…

So don’t try to bring me down because







My people are bundled up in fear

bundled up like sardine in fear

what are they afraid of i ask,

a group of people who are also afraid of them.

so who fears who

the fear of the people in a far away land

just near us has eaten us up so has eaten them

then it result to a fight

a fight for the fear of domination

one man fighting another base on the

country difference

xenophobia what have you done

you turned people into savage

lions wait to devour their prey

turning great allies into enemies 
But i can't stand for this 

it's time to fight 

not one another but the 

fear for one another

kill xenophobia i say

do not let rise in your eyes 

beat it in your mind 

flash it in your mind

nor read it in your head

this fear of intimidation

should be put in condemnation not to have accommodation

but should get confrontation

lets stop the fight 

and fight xenophobia.