prologue

alam mo ba, sinearch ko kung ano meaning ng...HAHAHAHAHA according kay google it is a number that resembles completeness and perfection. it's been a wild ride ever since nakilala kita and i think these two words hold the best definition of our seventh month. completeness in a sense that, kilala kita and alam ko na habits and interests mo. perfection kasi—well, you're perfect para saakin. a bit cheesy but its true! AND and. feel ko namiss mo 'to. ive been wanting to write these again pero i didnt know when to start HAHAHAHAHA pero i hope this letter finds you well! :(

bab, i just wanna start off by saying thank you. you don't know how much you've helped me these past seven months and i'm dead set on being with you hangga't kaya natin. you made me realize na ah, kaya ko pa pala mag-mahal. and it's so refreshing kasi si raika ang kasama ko. in most cases you're helping me become better, na maging gentle. (Na maging mas malibog fuck You)

i must admit na nahihirapan ako mag express ng thoughts whenever motmot natin HAHAHA kasi andami kong gustong sabihin. na you make me really happy and you're perfect and beautiful and amazing lahat na ng compliments bab.

But ayun. happy seventh satin :( we had a lot of bumpy roads ahead but its still a road nonetheless. patuloy pa rin naman kahit minsan may mga lubak sa daan. basta kasama ka sa journey, okay na. salamat kasi minahal mo ako kahit ganto ako. your very makulit and madaldal na cez T__T

anyway, ive made a bucketlist for us pero tsaka ko na irereveal kapag free ka today. ayos ba yun? HAHAHAHA i love you!

Happy seventh mahal, i'll see you on the second letter tonight!

ps. i'm really sorry this is not the best gift i can give you today, but i believe this is the most sentimental one i can give? HAHAHAHAHA its so reminiscent of our past musings kasi. and, it feels like coming home.

merry christmas! 🎄

the holiday letter is here! 12 entries, can you believe? Parang nung nakaraan lang ako nagsimula sa silakbo. I remember doing this at the start of october. And now fast forward weeks later, I'm writing a special christmas one. Time flies no, bab? Alam mo na I'm not a very consistent person; i've said that before. But we're here, and I don't plan to stop anytime soon. I hope this letter finds you well

I wanted the 25th to finish before writing this, so i'm sure about the things i wanted to say. I thought it would be nice din to write this while you're asleep, so i can take in the texts you've been sending the entire day. Na-aappreciate ko talaga bab na you've been enjoying christmas and you're updating me! Wala nang mas sasaya pa sa paskong kasama ang pamilya. Though it can be the root cause of political conflict (as u said, but its true na fuck bbms) it's really warm to have relatives commemorating the end of the year.

I think holidays like this one are bound to be happy, but i was unfortunate and cried at the start of the day. I really didn't want to spoil the mood but ayoko ring magtago. It was fun naman, to be with relatives but pasko is not celebrated na now that we're older. This year, especially, where i experienced a lot of losses. Was looking forward sa last feast pero hindi natuloy so I skipped even the regular dinner cos I really wasn't feeling it. Above all, it rained really hard pa so any sporadic plans of going out was already cancelled. This year's christmas to me wasn't sad, but it wasn't very happy either. It was a celebration, but not something entirely memorable. It felt like a regular day na maraming pagkain. Gifts were monetary nalang so the opening of presents were non existent. I wish umalis nalang kami, or nag out-of-town to still uphold that excitement, but alas. I also slept majority of the time kahapon, since we didn't have anything to do so i'm sorry if hindi kita na replyan.

You told me na sana hindi malamig pasko ko—and it's not. It's warm, but it was a bit lonely. I'm still really thankful sa lahat, for the homemade food, for the relatives na pumunta at nakipag-kwentuhan. For the gifts. I don't want to sound ungrateful, so i'm happy pa rin even if yesterday was not something i would remember. Most importantly though, I'm thankful kasi I have you. Sobrang nagpapasalamat. Hindi mo alam kung gaano ako kasaya na may nakakausap ako. May nagmamahal. I wish there were better words than "thank you" and "i love you" but wala eh, so i'll continue to say that. Thank you kei, and mun. I love you both, equally so. Maligayang Pasko, mahal. I hope we get to have another Christmas next year. 🎄

tora ❤️

the holidays!

i think for the duration of this week nahirapan ako mag-isip ng pwedeng ilagay sa letter na hindi redundant at worthwhile reading. this was supposed to be issued nung tuesday pa HAHAHAHAHA since i wanted to celebrate the good news of your break! but low and behold, i had a busy but also not a busy week. it was tough emotionally but i'm here. i think this is also a declaration na no matter how bad things get uuwi ako para sumulat at magkwento sayo. kahit hindi ko na alam sasabihin ko nang hindi ka papaantukin. i hope this letter finds you well.

it's still december, but already the middle of the month. More than nga, kasi 17 na. Grabe, ang bilis bab :c parang kahapon lang nag celebrate tayo ng monthsary. Sometimes, the thought of time scares me kasi most days it feels repetitive and boring. Some days, ang bilis ng araw, tas babagal bigla. It's hard to navigate time for me kapag break kaya i'm having trouble with my body clock. Sporadic yung mga gusto kong gawin, even though I have the outmost freedom right now. I read it somewhere back in my Ethics and Philosophy classes na though humans crave for freedom, they feel the urge to surrender that freedom in exchange for security or comfort. And humans naturally conform din, whether it's a societal habit.

You know, when i talked with mom kahapon, she told me this would be the perfect time to rest when I'm away from uni. The academia has been my source of strength and also weakness, kaya i'm feeling a bit lost because i'm nowhere in between. I'm in the middle at the same time i'm not. Is that too personal, mahal? Nangangamusta ka kasi palagi, so nilalapag ko mga thoughts ko. I can't seem to relax kahit gusto ko. Siguro that's why i heavily sleep lately din, because that's the only time when I'm at ease and don't think. There's not a day where i don't overthink kaya the best way for me to cope is by talking to you and fuyu, and mindlessly doing these virtual game achievements to feel something. But regardless, I feel happy. Not contented, but enough to to say na i'm doing fine.

So that's me. I apologize pala in advance for somewhat ranting sa safe space mo. Kamustahin naman kita mahal? I'm sure you've been fighting for your rest din. And now you've gotten to the start of your break, I just want to first and foremost congratulate you for making through December! I feel really happy and grounded whenever you tell me you're busy or biglang may pinagawa leader mo like the other day. HAHAHAHA. I don't know, it's fun for me to see my baby working hard. I'm pretty sure mama's proud of you. As well as your nephew. Nakikita ka nilang hindi mo pinapabayaan pag-aaral mo. I am a sole witness of your exhaustion due to uni works but grabe ka kasi you've always held yourself well kahit pagod ka na. So unrelenting and strong, bab. These days it seems like mas madali pang mag-give up but not once did you mention something like that. Siguro personally you've wanted to stop na, but you're here and you're progressing so i'm really proud of you. But let's say hindi pala ganun, and you've already given up, that's fine too. I'm still proud of you.

If it's not too much to ask, let me know kung kamusta ka mahal? Medyo nakakamiss yung mga essay replies mo rin ☹️ we haven't been talking a lot, puro harutan lang pag torahour 😔 it's okay though. I love both.

Anyway, I'm excited for the upcoming days. I typically like christmas cus of the monetary gifts we get and the wonderful food. I hope we'll be able to celebrate fuyu's birthday and the bft christmas party! Really looking forward sa mga movies na papanoorin natin. I'll see you on the next entry, bab. I love you!

💗 tora

60 days & counting

mahal! hi! i think you already know how happy i was yesterday. though the surprise is simple and the movie date we had last night was just right, im really glad you enjoyed. also ~ god? 60 days? And 10 silakbo entries...thats 10 weeks? We're really setting milestones bab 🥺. you know, im never consistent with things and i get tired really easily. but im glad na you're making me productive every week. just by writing this, i keep a better mindset, kaya thank you.

i hope this letter finds you well.

time to give my review sa 50 shades ~ nakakaturn off si christian grey. HAHAHAHA and ana is so beautiful. purely sexual relationships are really weird no, bab? I mean dont get me wrong people can do whatever they want but i feel like its always never gonna work if the other party wants more than sex, diba?

to me, love is very powerful. you can tread lightly and walk around the edges but edges are edges diba? you're bound to fall. maybe not in love kung hindi mo bet, pero yung madadala ka sa emosyon whether we like it or not. hurt? guilt? ganun. i dont know. i think that's why im so upfront and honest with you is cus i want to let you know na your emotions can be free with me. feel free to be angry or sad—anything. may our relationship be as liberating as love is. and i hope you know whether we bend (😏) or break (kung mangyari man yun) i'll still love you either way. HAHAHAHA. Pangit mo. 🖕🖕🖕

for this week's musings, i dont have much to say since i feel like magiging redundant content nung tys series so i'll try to avert your brain 😎 HAHAHAHAHA hope thats fine with you! though marami naman pwedeng pag usapan, it would be better if you read it nalang sa tumblr. im really excited (and nervous) sa last two surprises. but dont expect too much :0 its not anything grand really, but tandaan mo nalang yung inispam mo saakin na message. laki nung hint dun. HAHAHAHA.

anyway since i already gave a quick review, mangangamusta lang ako this time since i feel like i haven't been doing that lately. and ofcourse, giving you energy for next week. so tell me mahal, how have you been? Are you okay? Are you feeling okay? I know you're happy naman sa relationship natin but me aside, is kei okay? I hope you haven't been overthinking or what. oo man, i hope the things you spend time worrying over ay nawawala/na-reresolve. I know any part of this year can be hard and im well aware you've had your fair share of mental exhaustion. So, sana okay ka. I know there are things you'd rather not talk about because it would be too personal but please know i'm here! I'm just as human as you are. I'm reminding you that your privacy is well respected but i'm also encouraging you to open up yung mga hindi na kayang kimkimin para hindi ka nasasaktan. If you're comfy lang naman. As usual, these are reminders for you and for myself to take it easy.

goodluck this week bab and hope you finish your tasks na satisfied ka. i love you so much!

💗 tora

Kalends

When things get tough, you still feel unspoken weights without me acknowledging them. You would ask me kung okay lang ako, and you would never miss the opportunity to reassure me of truths and promises. Sometimes i feel like we have the same brain, the same heart and behave the same way. Hindi ko alam HAHAHAAHA i know our food preferences can go to war pero set aside what the stomach is craving for, i feel like we've already tied the knot, made love and molded into one. Ang cheesy gago. Lactose intolerant pa naman ako. Pero my level of awareness and comfort are always on par with you—that's why I understand you. And right now, I can feel na you need someone to reassure you back. I'm sorry I have been lacking in that department bab, but hello. Punta ka lang saakin, yayakapin kita. Hahalikan. I'll help you dissolve whatever weight you're carrying and I hope this letter finds you well.

There are a lot of stuff i want to mention; i want to start your december with complete thoughts and things i've been meaning to say these days. I don't know how long this will take, pero i know it'll be a heavy entry. Here's my little reminder that you dont have to read this in one go HAHAHA. I'll try my best to section it, so you won't get overwhelmed. I love you a lot.

i.
This letter was a little delayed kasi i didn't know when the best time was. But after that fiasco with me being dramatic and us spending the night kahapon, I thought today would be the perfect time to do so. Sakto baby, December 1. Panibagong month. A month of celebration and ease. A reset from the november that wasn't too good. Another chance to celebrate our monthsary. I'm so happy, and so proud sa 4-5 weeks you've been surviving. Akalain mo yun bab? You made it this far. Every effort you've exerted will pay off in the long run, mahal. Only a couple more days siguro, and you'll have the time for yourself, your family and saamin pa ni fuyu. You will soon know rest, and kasama kita. Giving you so much warm hugs to pull through the remaining two days. I hope you'll be able to complete your tasks on time nang walang problema. Basta. I'm almost always active on discord, kaya if you need a hug or a kiss or anything andito naman ako. Go baby!

ii.
You know, i dont think ill ever stop being embarrassed for panicking the other day huhu. I feel sad knowing ive bothered your mind but since tapos na yun, all i can do is learn from that. I really appreciate lahat nung sinabi mo bab. Promise. I'm bad at replying sa mga encouragements mo kasi i feel like there needs to be a better word than thank you. But since thats all we have, I want to say thank you thank you thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. Maraming salamat. You dont know how much i pondered over what you said. And, nalinawan ako. And i'm so thankful. I hope bab, whatever you're struggling with, you'll be able to break away from that. Para saakin, enough ka. And i'm sure for other people, ganun rin. I don't know whats currently affecting your self-esteem, but please know na me and fuyu are very aware of who you are and we can proudly say na you're the most realistic person we've ever met. Someone na ang sarap ipagmalaki. You're so emotionally intelligent, grabe ka rin mang payo. I can still feel the hand and heart of a writer even though sinabi mong you're burnt out. Ma prinsipyo. Totoo. Mapagmahal. Everything bab, god i don't know. I feel so lucky and happy whenever i list out your qualities. Baka hindi mo ramdam na ganun ka kasi mas kilala mo sarili mo, but let me remind you na you've captured the hearts of two people na handa kang samahan sa lahat. We're willing to keep up with you. Ganun kataas tingin namin. And you're very worthy of that pedestal.

Breathe, bab. You're going to be okay. I love you so much. Im so proud of you.

💐 tora

Faster Days

I struggle to remember the date these days, mainly because I've been idle with only a couple of games and tv shows to accompany me. Despite the ragged unknowingness of "anong araw na ba?" I'm reminded about the morning, afternoons and nights (courtesy sa mga "baby, eat lunch" mo) HAHAHAHA. I can't tell if tranquil mga araw ko, or just boring. At this point, hindi ko na alam yung difference. I hope this letter finds you well.

You, on the other hand, seem to be extremely occupied as per usual. The holidays are fast approaching din kasi so you're bound to finish tasks before the break starts, so i understand! I just hope you're taking all necessary precautions with the work you put in, that you are not immensely exhausted. I wish you'll be able to have days where you can feel and think and freely do whatever you missed out on. Konting push nalang, mahal. Makakapagpahinga ka na.

I feel like nasabi ko naman na lahat nung gusto kong sabihin nung nakaraan HAHAHA Dramatic pero true. I'm trying to keep my words as concise rin so I don't trouble your mind often. I really mean it when i say na sana magkaroon ka ng oras sa sarili mo. Not just the face of academia pero yung willingness to have the alone time to work on yourself. We have a lot of time naman, so don't mind me. I love you and miss you.

tora 💗

colder days

i want to be a little dramatic and say omg winter is coming 🥶 kaso napakainit these days kaya wag na HAHAHAHAHA. I hope this letter finds you well.

its around ...3 am? Upon writing this? Nakatulog kasi ako biglaan, sorry bab D: it feels like i've been a sleepyhead rin lately. Hindi kita narereplyan on time :( pero i promise na babawi ako once i get myself together. These days, it feels like the winds and everything in between are against me. I've been (unfortunately) out of it and sad, a mood that has been looming over me ever since we entered November. Feeling more panic-y, more emotional and alone. I've observed that it's a seasonal behavior of mine to feel a bit disconnected but— i'm glad to have you grounding me. Hindi mo man alam sa papaanong paraan mo nagagawa yun, pero all i can say is you're doing a pretty damn good job in helping me with my moodswings; na even if this lack of smiles you seem to be a prominent figure in keeping me awake. You might even ask, Tora, may moodswings ka pala? HAHAHAHAHA Meron! Ang pangit ko magka-moodswings pero surprisingly im devoid of it. I'm managing better. All thanks to you. It's normal, yes, alam kong sasabihin mo rin yan but it's nice to know na i'm not as fragile as before ever since nakasama kita. Kaya salamat. Thank you for making me feel loved and sane.

Minention mo rin kahapon na parang maala-russian roulette yung tasks mo ngayon. Well i'm here to say (as usual) na i'm here lang if you need some help! You already know i'm super free kaya i'll be able to offer a hand if you need one. Each day is a day closer to the most anticipated Christmas break, and i hope you can hold on to the thought of it para you have something to look forward to. I'm praying na ma-lessen yung tasks mo, na happy and unshakable ka once you've burned through your to-do list, and i pray that you get to feel more than satisfactory sa mga maipapasa at magagawa mo. May this week (at sa katapusan ng taon) be kind to you. I love you so much.

tora 💗

p.s, medyo unbeta'd to, i wrote this half awake. HAHAHAHAHA

this is a bit long.

another week comes another letter. Hope hindi naman nakakasawa HAHAHAHA. you know the drill na at this point.

i hope this letter finds you well.

there's a lot of things i want to talk about sana regarding last week but i also want to talk about stuff this week. I'll try to be as concise as possible pero detailed rin? Sabi mo you like it pag dumadaldal ako, so that i shall do. I don't know when mo 'to mababasa, pero i hope you can read this first thing in the morning

i. behind the birthday
— it took like a week for fuyu and i; yung pagplano sa birthday mo. We were kinda debating kung anong gagawin HAHAHA Twitter thread? Graphic edits? Sa silakbo nalang? Then natatakot pa kaming i-dm si hani pati si ji kasi di namin alam kung papaano sila iaapproach HAHAHAHAHA. I'm glad we got to pull something before the clock hit nov 3, 12 am. i think, i'm so in love with surprising you after a very exhausting day. Alam ko kasing narerecharge ka agad. And, you like to read musings pag galing sa mga kilala mo. I hope i can pull them casually as guests dito sa weekly letters mo, but i believe i'm still a bit shy to ask for that. So, sakin ka muna. I really hope you liked the surprise we did! I honestly wanted to give you a site from scratch but i don't know how to code.

ii. first month
— after the birthday surprise, i was a bit overwhelmed. Medyo napagod ako and upset i didn't get to do much sa first month natin. Until now i'm still thinking of a better way—higit pa sa site, sa songs and sa weekly letters. Pero walang lumalabas :( Don't want to be too cliché rin. Pero i have time before our second month, so i think may chance pa? HAHAHAHA anyway. I hope you aren't too sad with that, i just don't know what to give you but myself. Sayong sayo na. Anyway—that plato date, masaya. That rave date, masaya rin. That genshin date, i think i could cry? It's not cus love na love ko yung game or what. I mean i do pero, you kept your promise of getting to play during our celebration. Sabi mo wala kang storage :( gagi, super thankful ako dun bab. Kahit super boring ako kalaro HAHAHAHA. I dont know what else to say but thank you. You can delete it na. Ang saya saya ko dahil dun. Para may storage ka na rin. (Na record ko naman na HAHAHAHA—worth 2 hours ata.) You were exhausted pero you still managed to prepare stuff. The twt account? And the website mahal? Grabe. My favourite gift sa lahat. I liked the poems. I dont know if na mention ko sayo, pero i keep heartfelt stuff talaga. Nakatago na 'to. Sana di ma close down yung mshake HAHAHAHA. I like how na incorporate mo lahat nung nagawa natin currently sa relationship natin. And how you feel. Grabe bab, ang galing mong manunulat. You're so skilled. The songs bab? Yung nirecommend mo? I love the lyrics. It makes me feel at ease sa sleepless nights ko ngayon. The yt recs? I'm binge watching them. Though hindi ko nilalahat kaagad para i know what to watch pa the following days. I love you so so much. Thank you for the best first monthsary ever. Tangina mo

iii. ordeals
— you've been suffering last week, i presume? Health check baby, are you okay? If hindi, alam mo namang may nakikinig sayo. I'm so proud of you for getting through last week. I know you'll be strong enough to surpass this week rin. Im so proud of you for simply getting through each day. You're busy and tired and aware ako diyan. I hope you find the time for rest and leisure on your own. Take a self care day—hour or even 5 mins. Whatever you're dealing with, kay emma and rindou, i hope you'll be able to heal from that soon. Proud of you for replying din. That must have taken a great chunk of your energy. Kaya i'm glad you've rested early.

iv. the week ahead
— parang nasabi ko na ata lahat nung gusto kong sabihin sayo? So, with that, i think its time na i address a couple things rin saakin. I can feel my energy draining, dont know if that's the lack of sleep or what pero its generally not good so im taking a day off my phone lang. maybe two? If i'm still devoid like this :( i know you'll be busy baby, so i think okay lang rin? Kasi in that way, you'll get to focus more on yourself while i'm away. Baka akala mo nakikipag break ako ha, tangina mo. Hindi, i need to sort things out—ako lang makakapag solve. I would run to you and fuyu naman, pero in this case it only needs me. Don't worry too much or what, okay lang ako. I'm reminding you as early as now to eat breakfast and go out for a run para makahinga ka. Eat lunch rin, marami. Merienda, dinner, please don't miss them. Drink lots of water para hydrated lagi. Take this opportunity rin to try and sleep around 9-10pm? Thats the best hour daw to sleep. Kaya rest lang rin kayo, and have a wonderful week ☹️ i love you so much bab. Uuwi ako. Promise.

❤️‍🔥 tora

hi love

I hope this letter finds you well. First i want to apologize sana na late ulit ako sa weekly musings HAHAHAHAHA i don't keep track of time these days and forgot na monday pala ☹️ pero that's besides the point. I'm here to say first and foremost na proud na proud ako sayo today for working hard and pulling through! Really felt how busy you were kaya siguro ako nakatulog HAHAHAHAHA i hope you are sleeping soundly 🙏 it's great na nag aadjust tayo. I hope you get to sleep all you want today. If hindi, i wish na magkaroon ka ng time for leisure and rest. Deserve mo yun.

also love, it's not wrong to fall asleep kahapon! You missed a class—i'm not sure how important it is pero you seem really upset about it. I know you feel guilty but that serves a reminder na pwede ka bumawi so don't worry. Alam mo, it's okay to not be at your best given the circumstances, so it's alright baby you're trying your best and i'm proud! Basta i'm here lang if you need to rant. Kahit ano pa yan. I'm here to listen. I don't even have to reply or pay much attention if you don't want me to, basta makikinig ako. 🥺

I also hope you've eaten well sa lahat ng meals mo, and i wish the same for today too! You have 4 days left pa for this week, and i know you'll tackle them well bab. Ikaw pa ba? You've already persevered throughout September. And now, malapit nang matapos ang October. It may seem like a tired endless cycle of academia, pero i know you'll be able to bear the fruits of your labor. Hang in there mahal! Andito kami ni fuyu. We are so so proud of you. You're very strong, lovie ko. Mahal na mahal kita.

love, tora. 💗

preoccupied

hello baby!

i know i've been busy lately so im sorry for that na hindi kita narereplyan D: babawi ako promise. anyway! you know what day it is (tama! MONDAY. kunwari monday. a day late nanaman ako) which means . Weekly Musings at kagaguhan HAHAHAHAHAHA

i hope this letter finds you well! First off, gusto kita kamustahin kasi i feel like whenever we talk, i'm the one whose getting asked lagi. so, how are you bab? i hope you're getting lots of rest and you're doing the things you love. while im away, go spend some time with friends or play cookie run HAHAHAHAHA i rarely get to ask if you've eaten >:( make sure you do kahit ako mismo nakakalimutan ko mag remind.

second, wag ka magalit... pa pikit na talaga ako kanina tapos my mind was like TORA u dummy its monday !! and so i decided ah sige so bab can wake up to something sweet 🥺🤍

anyway, i dont have anything to talk about yet, wala pa namang chika since nasabi ko na lahat ng imik ko pag gumagawa ng tasks HAHAHAHA but i wish na yung week na 'to is maging easy and relaxed for you. if may bumps ahead, I'll be here lang, as always. Hinding hindi aalis.

I also want to say thank you for being patient and kind with me sa mga oras na 'to 😔 di ka nagkulang sa reminders and i really want to say thank you for those kasi they really help. magiging competitive na ako at hintayin mo yan, ako rin magiging cute sa reminders. HAHAHAHAHAH. Im happy na nakapag rave tayo tonight, I really enjoyed it. Sana maulit pero this time with fuyu? Hehe.

This letter is all over the place pero 😔 hope you had fun reading it. If mas maaga ako matapos this week, i might upgrade your weekly letters since i have the time naman 💗 so ayun lang naman. I love you a lot bab. I hope you're sleeping na rin.

love, tora

bab,

this day was heavy for you huh?

i hope this letter finds you well. it's saturday, and i'm about...6 days behind on my weekly musings. but now that i've burned through 1/5 of the heaviest tasks i had this week, i feel like i can do anything.

anyway, how are you bab? i decided to follow up the letter no matter how late it is hehe. i also can't sleep because im sensitive to caffeine so i currently don't know where to spend my energy on. i think, at most, this is the best and probably worst headspace i've ever had. but bear with me, hindi kita nadaldal. HAHAHAHA. sabi mo sana di ako tumigil, so gagawin ko nalang rito.

i didn't get to answer your questions properly kanina, so i'll follow up! Yes, i've eaten all three meals yesterday! I got to take breaks as promised, and i think my temp has gone down. I made sure to take meds during the designated time so i can expect full recovery today. i know tatanungin mo "kumusta progress?" so unahan na kita. im both at 100% and 1%, but having at least one task done is liberating pala! I'll try to squeeze in some more tasks before i indulge sa rest.

i can tell yesterday really wasn't your day bab. bad days are so so shitty. nakakairita no? sarap maging tae. but just as the sun sets and the moon rises, all things will pass. you got through the day still intact, diba? i'm proud of you. i love you. i wish i was there to comfort you pa, and i wish my timing wasn't off, pero i hope and i pray na you'll only get better days from now on.

i hope you wake up feeling better, mahal. eat breakfast na and sleep in if you feel tired.

mahal na mahal kita.

💗 tora

start

hello bab,

i hope this letter finds you well. i've been meaning to send musings for the past week now and what better way to do it than to create a site? HAHAHAHA anyway na excite ako kasi feel ko magsusulat ako for a penpal but it's for the person i admire the most. Teka direk na eexcite ako HAUAHUASH. pero ayun, let me get into it na kasi.

it's begrudgingly a busy monday for you. medyo hindi tayo nakapag-daldalan much, but i love how you're keeping me updated kanina. i appreciate yung energy mo to ask how i am despite how tired you are :( so let this weekly musings be a way for you to relax!

by the way, how are you? i hope you're somewhat okay and that you're taking all necessary self care measures para hindi ka laging pagod. don't stress out too much okay? and always remember na nandito kami ni fuyu. it's the start of the week pero parang ang sarap nalang humilata no?

like yung mga bilin mo sakin, i hope you can take the same advise you've been giving me hehe. kapag pagod, mag pahinga. kapag may nagawang progress, be proud kasi it's still progress. listen to music, or catch up with friends as a form of break. you can do it bab, alam kong malalagpasan mo yung week na 'to. i hope this can also fuel your motivation sa incoming days. i don't know how deep or heavy your ocean is, but i'm here to keep you afloat. remember that, mahal.

i love you
— tora.